a TAPIF language assistant blog / un blog d’une assistante d’anglais

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Tuesday, September 11, 2012

FAQ, pre-France style

As my departure date approacheth, I continue to get many of the same questions regarding the whole France business. I also am beginning to collect a few new ones. I decided to make a list of these Frequently Asked Questions (and Frequently Stated Statements, in some cases) and to answer them/explain the cultural reason(s) behind the answers, if applicable. This post is both productive AND culturally informative (for those of you who aren't very familiar with la belle France).

DISCLAIMER: If you have asked me one of these questions, and I give a silly/sarcastic response here, please don't be offended. I assure you each of these has been asked more than once. Also, it's just more fun/a little therapeutic if I answer them this way.

1)  Q: Where are you going to live?
     A: I'm not sure yet. I'll stay on campus at my school for at least the first while, and then I don't know. Will I stay there permanently? Will I move in with roommates? Will I live with a family? Will I find my own place (very difficult and therefore unlikely)? I don't know, and that's OKAY. Most Americans I talk to gasp/look at me as if I just said "I'm considering living on a park bench or under a bridge with some pigeons" when I say I'm not really sure yet. But I'm not worried. I am usually a pretty high-strung person, but there's something about France that calms me and draws out of my adopted French mindset of "C'est la vie!" It'll all get figured out, no worries, y'all.

2) Q: Well, aren't they* flying you over there and arranging your housing?
    A: No. I'm not exactly being flown over to be the CEO of France. Nor is this Texas Tech Freshman Orientation Fall 2005; come move into some dorms and your advisor will help you figure out which classes to take! Nor is France an all-inclusive resort, mes amis. There are approximately 1200 teaching assistants who come to France each year in this program. I am not a unique snowflake in this situation, and France does not have a responsibility to cater to my every need. They are giving me a job for a year and granting me temporary citizenship and all benefits therein. They are already allowing me a privilege. Let's not be demanding here, people.

3) Q: Well, you'll be making a lot of money, won't you?
    A: No. I will work 12 hours/week, and I will be paid accordingly.

4) Q: If you're not making a lot of money, why are you going?
    A: Seriously?! You've got to be kidding me. Question is, why WOULDN'T I drop everything for a year to live in France?! If you ask/think this question, you're missing the point.

5) Q: Are you taking your car?
    A: No. I've never looked into the cost of transatlantic auto shipping, but I can almost guarantee that it would cost more than my 12-year-old car is worth. Also, in most parts of France, you don't NEED a car. They have this neat thing called public transportation, both within and between cities. (Come on America, get on board! (Literally!)) It's pretty legit.

6) S(tatement): Be very, very careful Katy. You know what can happen. Be safe. Moving to France by yourself is so dangerous! (All said with very serious, grave faces as if I'm headed for war-torn Sudan or a Mexican border town.)
    R(esponse): First of all, I understand that these statements are born of love and concern. Second of all, of course I will always take caution and be aware of my situation. I am 25, I have traveled before, and I'm actually a pretty smart cookie. Third of all, if you are not already aware, let me let you in on a little secret: France is a MUCH safer country than the United States. You are infinitely safer in Paris than you are in Dallas, Texas. I mean, I've lived in Baton Rouge, Louisiana before, and I guarantee you that any given day in Baton Rouge was more dangerous than the collective danger I will face in France during the whole eight months. (And yet, I survived Baton Rouge perfectly unscathed, unless you count emotional distress resulting from Hurricane Gustav.) Violent crime rates are MUCH lower in France than they are here, and guns are not allowed. Granted, there's a lot of pick-pocketing, but that's not that big of a deal. You're inconvenienced, but life goes on. There is always room for freak accidents (e.g., All the dogs in France get rabies and one bites me!, A bus loses control and knocks me off my bike!,** A toilet seat from a space shuttle falls on me from the sky!***), but in all likelihood, the worst things that could happen to me will likely be a) My wallet gets stolen, b) My luggage gets lost, or c) I lose my iPod.****

7) S: Ohhhh, you're SO going to meet someone/marry a Frenchman and live there forever!
    R: First of all, that is not anywhere near the point. Second of all, I'll never say never, but I will say highly unlikely. I love France and the French and their quirks, but as of my experiences thus far, I haven't been attracted to any French guys. (If you're French please don't be offended!) That's not to say it's impossible, because everyone is an individual. But in general (and for better or for worse), I'm kind of accustomed to American guys, Southern ones in particular. (Side note: Honestly, I'm probably not the kind of girl most French guys would like, anyway. I'm kind of loud. Sometimes, I snort when I laugh. I talk too much. I don't think France is gonna be all up on this anyway; it goes both ways.) Third of all, if you know me, you know I'm slow to jump into anything. So in conclusion, let's all chill with every woman I meet projecting her secret dreams of a French romance on me, and just let me go to France for me and me alone. I would much rather come out of this experience with a deeper understanding of the world and of myself than a relationship.

8) S: Well, this could turn into a more permanent job, right? You can just extend it 'til next year or it could turn into a permanent position?
    R: No. You can re-apply to the program once, but you don't get priority. If I re-applied to the same program it'd have to be in the same region and I wouldn't find out until as late as September-ish if I got back in. That's a little too much uncertainty for me, people. IF I did it again, it'd be in a few years in a different region. And no, it can't turn into a permanent position. If I wanted a permanent position in France, I'd have to actively seek it out. I'm not ruling anything out (I have a take-life-as-it-comes policy, this applies to statement 7, above, as well), but as of right now, the plan is to return to Fort Worth in May and seek a high school French position. And unpack all of my books. And get my own apartment again. :)

*I suppose the "they" people are referring to when they ask this question is the government of France?

**In theory, I will hopefully buy a bike in France and then ride without immediate injury! Biking is not something I usually do, fyi.

***À la Dead Like Me.

****This WILL happen, and it will be no fault of France's. It will be because I am a mess regardless of which continent I inhabit. Also, jeez a LOO there are a lot of footnotes on this post. Sorry.

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